Will We Ever Have Peace In 2020?

George Floyd.

     If you have been paying attention this past week, you've heard about George Floyd and the terrible tragedy that ended his life. It was brutal, disgusting, wrong, and the very depiction of the worst of humanity. Those officers deserve the very worst the law can give them and they NEVER should have had the badge in the first place. They are the scum of the earth and I can't even begin to express the outrage I feel towards them.

     But I believe we are giving way too much attention to the "officers" and not enough time to talking about George Floyd himself.

     From everything I've learned about him recently, he was an amazing man. A man who people called a "person of peace", and a man who fought for a better community and life for the next generation. The Pastor of Ressurection Houston was quoted saying:
“George Floyd was a person of peace sent from the Lord that helped the gospel go forward in a place that I never lived in.”

It is absolutely devastating and heartbreaking that he was murdered. It never should have happened and there will never be a reason for police brutality. NEVER.

Please watch this short video to hear George himself share his heart.   George Floyd speaking his truth.


   Now that we know a little more about this wonderful man, and the fact that he was a man of peace, I've been thinking about all of the chaos I'm seeing on tv and on social media. I can't believe that he would be ok with the "protests" that have been happening in his name.

Let me be clear: I am ALL for justice and awareness that brings major change in this country when it comes to racism. It is time for real change and it's high time we had those uncomfortable conversations. But this is NOT THE WAY. Looting, shooting at each other, attacking innocent people, burning down buildings and businesses - STOP. You will never get what you want or prove your point with violence. Violence is never the answer. Killing innocent people is never the answer. Killing George Floyd was WRONG, but when people go and kill in return, it makes them no better than the cops who kill(ed) innocent people too.



THIS IS A PROTEST. This brings real change.






THIS IS NOT A PROTEST. This breeds hate and kills many, many more innocent people.


     What's worse, is this is exactly what the real racists want. This is exactly what the media wants; To divide us in every way possible. By race, age, political party, religion, class and status. DON'T LET THEM WIN. Do you notice how all of a sudden, Coronavirus has magically disappeared in the news? Have you noticed how the media spins every story to paint their narrative? Wake up and notice the patterns, people. They are playing you. They are controlling the narrative any way they choose and society is letting them.  Have you noticed how black men and women are killed daily, yet the media only shows you the stories that they can use, manipulate and spin to fit their narratives? Did you know this was an election year? Have you noticed how divided we are becoming as a nation, even in our own families? Is that ok with you?

It is time to RISE UP and stand up to the real racists. The real white supremacists. DO NOT LET THEM DIVIDE US. They can't stand it when black and white people get along, When black communities thrive. When minorities succeed. They want us at each others throats, blaming each other, hating each other, and worst of all, killing each other. When are we going to say enough is enough? Stop listening to the main stream media. Do your own research. Be smart and use your mind to find the truth. Zoom out and see the big picture. Stop letting lies and emotions dictate over truth. Stop listening to celebrities, athletes, so-called journalists and people who know nothing about what the every day person goes through, tell you how you should think, vote, feel or act. Stop being a slave to hate.
   You want to see a real white supremacist? Look no further than this man right here: George Soros.


Have you ever heard of him before? You should have. If nothing else, you must have heard Taylor Swift mention him and his family in her anger, during her 2019 Billboard Women of the Decade speech. He was one of the main funders behind stealing her music catalog out from under her. But that is just the teeny, tiny, speck of the iceberg of this evil man. I beg of you, if you want TRUE change, if you want to know the truth, if your heart hurts seeing all of the hate and anger out there right now, look this man up. He is a billionaire who funds everything evil in this world. Just do your research. (I recommend using the search engine duckduckgo.com. They don't censor anything.)


     All of this madness the last few months has made me do a lot of searching and learning and finding out the truth. The things that happen behind the scenes. The good, the bad, the ugly.
I have this one line from The Hunger Games: Catching Fire resounding in my mind, over and over again...

But guess what? WE can be the change!

YES, Black lives matter, but this is not black versus white; This is wrong versus right. We need to come together in peace and love and grow closer together as humans. We are all the same - no matter your race, religion, social status, sexual orientation etc. We are all humans who have a voice and the power to change this world. Let's lead with love. Let's show the evil people out there that we are going to come together, not push each other away. That is real change. So let's keep speaking his name, but let's also continue his fight for peace. George Floyd, RIP.


To all of the good Police officers out there who fight for justice and for what is right, who fight to keep us safe and who have been devastated by all of these "cops" who should have never had a badge to begin with, I say thank you. I support you and thank you for joining us in fighting for true justice.

I'll leave you with these 2 things. Please pay close attention to this picture and please listen to this song. I love you all and my heart hurts for the pain that is being inflicted on this world. I stand with you. 🤍🤎🖤💓

PLEASE LISTEN TO THIS SONG!

Why You Need To Watch 13 Reasons Why

 WARNING: Intense subject matter discussed ahead.

I have so many thoughts running through my head right now, I don't even know where to start. 

Unless you've been on a desert island for the last month, I'm going to assume you've heard of 13 Reasons Why - a new show on Netflix based on the bestselling book by Jay Asher. I won't go into all of the details because it's deep and there are plenty of articles out there if you really want to know more about it in depth, but the gist is that the protagonist, Hannah Baker, commits suicide and leaves tapes for specific people who she claims are one of the reasons why she went through with it.

I wasn't going to say anything about this show. I was going to leave my opinions to myself and let people come to their own conclusions. But I have been shocked by the amount of backlash this show has gotten. Blogs and articles have been written slamming this show for glorifying suicide and making it an option for kids. They say that this show is horrible because it's full of profanity and shows things that shouldn't be seen - like rape, violence and suicide.  They say that this show doesn't give any other option than suicide if you're depressed or feel like you're alone. They say it makes suicide glamorous. 

I say that's bull.


This show is dark, intense, dramatic and yes, hard to watch at times.  But it does anything but glorify suicide, sex, or bullying. It's actually just the opposite. It's real. 

It's not pretty. It's not glamorous. It's not a feel good, inspiring show. But I think it's one of the most important things you and your teen could watch right now. 

We live in an age where everyone has an opinion and everyone speaks their mind. Thanks to social media bullying is at an all time high because anyone, can say anything, at anytime and hide behind a keyboard. We've lost sight of how important our words are. We're divided. We've been taught to hate people who disagree with us and all you have to do is turn on the news to see that we have become an overly sensitive, hyper sensitive, bullying culture. There used to be two sayings you were taught when you were little. "If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all" and "Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me". We have abandoned the first one and convinced ourselves that we're weak if we don't live by the second one. But that saying couldn't be more false. 13 Reasons Why exposes this. 

Words have power. Whether we choose to realize this or not, it's a fact. Words can build us up or tear us down. They can make someone's day or they can push people to the edge. They can cut deeper and leave scars longer than even some physical scars that will heal with time. Words have power.

Now some people might say that I don't know what I'm talking about. That they're older and wiser and I couldn't possibly understand what this show could do to the psyche of the viewer. They might say that they just want to protect their kids and shelter them from the horrors in this show. I understand that. I'm not trying to tell anyone how to parent. I've just been a teenager a little more recently than they have. I have also been bullied and depressed. I've had suicidal thoughts, been through the suicide of a close family member and have heard the story and pain of another person close to me who has gone through a horrible rape. I'm well aware of the horrors that are shown in this show. But that's the point - these things need to be seen and talked about.

Depression is real.

Rape is real.

Bullying is real.

Suicide is real.

These are not comfortable subjects to think or talk about. These are things that I wish didn't exist and try to push out of my mind because every time I think about any of it - what I've been through or what people close to me have been through - it breaks my heart. But there are people dealing with these things every single day. There are countless teenagers who are hiding in their rooms or bathrooms cutting themselves just to feel something. There are so many people out there who feel all alone and feel like no-one would understand them. They feel like the pain is so overwhelming and like there's no one who cares.  13 Reasons Why shows them that they're not alone. That bad things happen to good people. That people can be jerks and if you're being bullied, it's not your fault. But ultimately, it shows the finality and horror of taking your own life. 

People say it's too graphic. I say it's necessary. Suicide is not beautiful. Suicide is not easy. Suicide is serious and it is final. It needs to be shocking to show people how serious this really is. There is no beauty in it. It's horrifying. People say that it will make more kids commit suicide. To that I say if a person is considering suicide because of 13 reasons why, their problems have started way before this show and they would be considering it with or without it. The show is not going to be the root cause. Be alert, be aware and reach out to anyone who is seeming depressed or withdrawn. Even if they fight you or don't open up, don't give up. They need you. Desperately. 

I don't think I have seen anything as important as this show in a very long time. It gets people thinking and hopefully, it helps people become better, nicer people. To show teens what not to do. To give people a reality check and make people more aware of their surroundings and the people who are reaching out for someone, ANYONE to listen to them. I hope it makes people more accepting and I hope it helps people be a better friend... I hope it makes people think and reach out the next time they see the kid all alone at school or work with no one to talk to and no friends.  I hope it makes people better listeners. More present. I hope it makes girls and guys have the courage to speak out if they've been assaulted or raped. But more than anything, I hope it shows how important what we say and do is. Words have power and actions have consequences. Spread love and light in this world and remember, high school doesn't last forever, but the way you make people feel will. 

So, I hope you watch this show. I hope you learn something from it, even if you're not a teenager. I hope you start the conversations with your kids that aren't comfortable and I hope you realize that these things NEED to be discussed, not just shoved under the rug. 

Also, if you're reading this and your world seems dark - like there's no way out except suicide, IT'S A LIE. I have been there. I know the pain. But I also know that there is help out there and that it does get better. You are WAY too important and special to leave this earth. You are here on this planet for a reason. You have a purpose and you matter. Don't listen to the voice inside your head that says the people around you and this world would be a much better place without you. It's not true. Don't deprive the world of your light. There will NEVER be another you. PLEASE talk to someone. Anyone. A friend, a parent, a teacher, a pastor, a grandparent... I promise, someone will listen and people care. You are loved. If you ever doubt that, please read the blog I wrote from the family's perspective of a suicide victim here. The world will be an empty, dark place without you. Please stay.


So, stop bashing this show. Stop saying it's "too much" and please, open your eyes to the world your kids live in every day. The kinds of things they go through and encounter and are faced with, even if you don't know it. Please don't try to hide from it. Face it.

I hope you see my side of this debate. I hope you see the good in this show and I hope it changes you for the better.

Until next time...

<3 Brooke


Help options:

(Suicide prevention hotline: 1-800-273-8255)

(https://afsp.org/find-support)

(https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/)

You don't even know...

     I have been through a lot in my life. More than I think anyone, aside from my parents, knows.

    Now, I know that we ALL have stories. Everyone has been through things. Amazing and horrible things. But if we're doing anything right, we should be learning from every experience we have in life. Sometimes big lessons, sometimes small. But something.

   Here is a story about one of those lessons for me.


    A few years ago, I was feeling a pull to leave my old church. There was a change in season and a knowing in my heart that it was not the right place for me to be.  So after a long time of praying, some experiences, and confirmation through my family (who had been feeling the same way), we left.  (In a future blog, I will talk about why and about the AMAZING God journey we've been on since.)

   There has been a LOT of talk, rumors spread and assumptions made as to why my family and I ended up leaving - almost all of them are wrong.

    We went through all of the proper channels and talked to all of the right people about leaving and always wanted to make sure we had a heart that honored the church and the Pastors. We thought we had done it right - they seemed to think otherwise. I have never experienced such a "shunning" in my entire life.  Silly things happened - even like people deleting us off of Facebook, talking about us behind our backs, and making up lies. It has actually gotten to the point now where if I try to talk to some of the people that I used to be close with from the church, they delete my comment or just ignore me completely.

    Does that sound like Christianity? Since when did church become a "club" where you're only accepted if you're there but if you leave, you're out. Where is the love or loyalty? Compassion and grace?!

     One of the things that really frustrated me, was when my mom wrote to the person she was supposed to write to, with complete respect and honor, and they wrote her back with a message of basically "make sure you don't steal the 'sheep' or touch the anointed. It will be bad if you do."

    Really?

   Now despite my frustrations and hurt, I have no bad feelings towards the church or anyone there. Honest to goodness. Neither does my family. We never did. EVER.

However, all of this really made me think about something.

    "Don't touch God's anointed" - people use this in reference to pastors. Any pastors. They are the anointed ones. But I have a little surprise - YOU have a calling too. One that you have been created and anointed for as well.  It may not fit the church mold. THAT'S OK. Maybe you're called to be an artist, a singer, an attorney, a doctor, a cheerleader, a scientist, an engineer, a sailor, a mom... you were created to thrive in that - to reach people that may never step foot in a church - to love your life and live with passion.

   I know my calling. I know it's not God's timing to walk out that calling yet, but I still have it. Therefore, I will be anointed to carry it out. So then, why is it ok to attack, spread rumors about or "touch" me? It's not. It's also not ok to punish people or make people feel bad for doing what they were taught to do - follow God's leading.


  My calling is not your calling. Your calling is not my calling. I am not called to church ministry and I am not called to be a Pastor - AND THAT'S OK.  Jesus said to go out into all the world - that includes outside of the church walls - going to places that could be "unacceptable" or "not holy".  The church should be there to support their brothers and sisters - not shunning them and cutting them out instead.

   I know a lot of people that have had similar experiences in church or gotten bitten by the sting of religion. That's not ok. Church isn't a club. It shouldn't be about who's popular, how much money you have, or whether you're serving every weekend in kids ministry.  But sadly, that is what it has become for a lot of people. It seems like it's become so much more about the "heart of the church", the "heart of the pastors" or "serving", that JESUS gets lost in the crowd.

   Christians are hiding their judgement behind the label of "clicking" - if they don't like a person - whether it be the way they look, their clothes, their income, their sexual orientation, or anything else, they blame it on the fact that they just don't "click" with that person.  We're supposed to be the most loving, compassionate, accepting, understanding people ever. "Christian" means Christ follower - right? Why are the church and it's members not reflecting Him better?

 

     That quote is a perfect example of how we should NOT be making people feel.

     When Jesus was on the earth, people RAN to Him. They wanted to be around Him. Mary sat at His feet, John laid his head on Jesus' chest and other people just wanted to get a chance to see Him. He never condemned a sinner - He only got angry with the religious, holier than thou, pharisees.  So if we are supposed to be Christ followers and reflect Christ, why aren't people running to us now? Because it's become more about the religion than the relationship - as cliché as that sounds, it's true.

Religion stinks guys. Anything that stinks is something that people will run away from.


    I want to apologize to any christian, atheist or non believer that has been burned by the church, their pastors or members - that is not Christ. That is not Jesus. That is religion and I am so sorry for the stench.



Until next time...

<3 Brooke

"...You will not be afraid of the terror by night..."

     ISIS. Ebola. Shootings. Terrorism.
    
    Men, women and children are being murdered daily. 


    Our world is going crazy. 

   I don't know about you but sometimes I get scared. I don't know where to go to feel safe. I don't know what I can do to help and I don't know if it will ever end. These are normal human feelings.  

     But I for one do NOT want to live my life in fear. God doesn't want that and I know that even in this madness,  I want to live my life to the fullest and ENJOY every day. 

     So if you're like me and you need a word of encouragement or just want something to hold on to in these dark days, I want to share this with you. 

     I encourage you to read it, meditate on it, speak it, pray it, share it and hold on to it. Let it bring you comfort today. 


____________________

Psalm 91 New American Standard Bible (NASB)

 

He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High
Will abide in the shadow of the Almighty.
2 I will say to the Lord, “My refuge and my fortress,
My God, in whom I trust!”
3 For it is He who delivers you from the snare of the trapper
And from the deadly pestilence.
4 He will cover you with His pinions,
And under His wings you may seek refuge;
His faithfulness is a shield and bulwark.

5 You will not be afraid of the terror by night,
Or of the arrow that flies by day;
6 Of the pestilence that stalks in darkness,
Or of the destruction that lays waste at noon.
7 A thousand may fall at your side
And ten thousand at your right hand,
But it shall not approach you.
8 You will only look on with your eyes
And see the recompense of the wicked.
9 For you have made the Lord, my refuge,
Even the Most High, your dwelling place.
10 No evil will befall you,
Nor will any plague come near your tent.

11 For He will give His angels charge concerning you,
To guard you in all your ways.
12 They will bear you up in their hands,
That you do not strike your foot against a stone.
13 You will tread upon the lion and cobra,
The young lion and the serpent you will trample down.

¹⁴ “Because he has loved Me, therefore I will deliver him;
I will set him securely on high, because he has known My name.
¹⁵ “He will call upon Me, and I will answer him;
I will be with him in trouble;
I will rescue him and honor him.
¹⁶ “With a long life I will satisfy him
And let him see My salvation.”

-----------------------

Let not your heart be troubled. It will all be ok in the end.

Until next time...

<3 Brooke

Suicide - the other side of the story.

Suicide.

     It represents a lot of things. Not just the act of one taking their own life, but also anger, depression, numbness, loneliness, hurt, and the desperation of feeling like you have no other option.

A little voice inside your head saying things like "You don't matter", "The world would be so much better without you in it", "Everyone would be happier", "You're worthless."

IT'S. A. LIE.

I have been through a lot of things in my life. I have seen very dark days and been so low that I didn't know if I would ever see the light again. I contemplated ending it all and not burdening people with my problems. But along with my relationship with Christ and Him pulling me out of such a dark pit, there was one other reason I never went that far.

In 2009, a family member of mine took their own life. They let their light burn out too early and it shook me to my core. So this is the other side of suicide. A look at the family's perspective. The story you don't get to hear.

-----------------------------


     Yesterday, a well known celebrity passed away. Everyone is saying it was suicide and a lot of people have totally different opinions on the subject. Some people are sad, some have compassion and some are calling it a selfish act. That really bothers me. While it IS a selfish act, I can guarantee you that when you're in that dark place, you're not thinking clearly. You actually believe it's the most selfless thing you could do for the people around you.

It's not.

When I first heard the story, my heart and mind immediately went to the actor's family. My heart broke instantly for them. I knew their lives were now changed forever.

     I remember the day like it was yesterday. When I first heard the news that a family member of mine had taken their own life, I didn't know what to do. There were no words. I didn't even cry for the first twenty minutes because I was in shock and felt like I needed to be strong for my family. I remember going into my bedroom, sitting on my bed and rocking back and forth just trying to tell myself that I was ok and it would all be ok. It was a kind of panic attack I had never had before and a pain I don't wish on anyone.

It wasn't ok.

     That was one of the most devastating, heartbreaking, surreal times for my family to go through. Everyone hurried around trying to get things in order and get things done, yet it felt like we were all living in slow motion and that it was just a horrible dream. Surely this wasn't real. Surely the memories, the laughs, the hugs, the sarcasm, the encouragement, the love and everything else about this person that made them so amazing, wasn't gone forever. But they were.


---------------------------------

     It has been years now since that family member passed, but the space in all of our hearts is still empty and hurting. There's a piece gone that we can never get back.

 I know that this person believed that this would be the best decision for everyone. They wouldn't be a burden to anyone and we would all be fine. It couldn't be further from the truth.

     Families of suicide victims are left hurting, broken, guilt ridden, dazed... wondering what they could have said or done to help. "If we would have only known..."


     So before you judge someone who has done this horrible thing, call them selfish or say they've sinned, think about the families of these people and say a prayer for them. They need it more than you could ever know.

Also, be a friend. Reach out, take the time to care, check in with people, be available and just listen. You never know what people are going through.

----------------------------------


     I know that I would not have been able to get through that time and tragedy if it hadn't been for my family and Jesus. He was there. Always. Comforting and healing my world and heart. He'll be there for you too.

-----------------------------------


If you have ever thought about ending your life and that the world would be better without you, PLEASE know that that is a lie straight from the devil's mouth. Don't do it. Don't let your fire go out. Don't do that to your family. Don't do that to yourself.

YOU are precious. YOU are valuable. YOU have a purpose. YOU have a calling. YOU are a world changer. Don't let anyone or anything make you feel otherwise. Also, talk to someone. I know it is hard to open up, be vulnerable and let your guard down, but it is worth it. This world needs you. Talk to a family member, a friend, a teacher, a co-worker, a pastor, or the suicide prevention hotline (http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org).  People WILL listen.


Also, if you are someone that has ever had a friend or family member commit suicide, I am so, so sorry. My heart goes out to you and I completely understand. I will be praying for you. Just remember, it's not your fault.

If you're reading this, YOU are loved.

Until next time...

<3 Brooke

Is there a double standard?

double standard

 noun

: a situation in which two people, groups, etc., are treated very differently from each other in a way that is unfair to one of them

2

:  a set of principles that applies differently and usually more rigorously to one group of people or circumstances than to another - (Merriam-Webster.com)

Double standards. 

This is something that I have always known about. Something I've always seen. Something I've never agreed with but didn't think too much about.

Lately, however, I've been seeing it too often and it really got me thinking - why do we all, if we're honest with ourselves, have double standards? 

Before I go forward, I want to make sure that I am being perfectly clear when I say this is NOT a post to "call people out" or make anyone feel bad. It's not supposed to be depressing or condemning. This is just something that I've observed and my thoughts on the issue!

______________________

I've heard so many times "You shouldn't do ..." or "I can't believe they did..." - "I could never do..." or "How could you ever support..."

Here are a few examples: 

*Someone judges someone who decides to drink a beer while they watch a game, because it's "not Holy", but THAT person has serious road rage and anger issues.

*A performer on an award show (who is a Christian) can have a dark, demonic performance, but because people like that person, they still support and encourage that person no matter what. While at the same time, another artist (who is also a Christian), can do something stupid and land themselves in jail, and the SAME people who supported the first artist, bash the second artist up and down, left and right - just because they don't like them. 

*Phil Robertson vs. Macklemore and Ryan Lewis. - They BOTH stood up for what they believe in. But only one of them did it with grace. Both of them have influence, but only ONE of them is classified as "intolerant" to others' beliefs. They both stated their PERSONAL beliefs - only one of them was torn down for having them.

- I'm sorry, but that is just wrong. All of it.

We need to stop having these double standards    - and Christians, we have to   

STOP. RANKING. SIN.

A friend of mine asked me one time "what sin is the biggest?" 

My answer was this: None of them. God doesn't rank sin. Sin is sin. If you rob a bank or tell a little white lie, it's all a sin. But sins DO have a ranking of consequences. There will be a much bigger consequence if you rob a bank, versus telling your friend you didn't take her last piece of gum.

____________________

Mark 6:!4a

34 As Jesus landed, He saw a great crowd waiting, and He was moved with compassion for them...

Mark 2:17

17 And hearing this, Jesus said to them, “It is not those who are healthy who need a physician, but those who are sick; I did not come to call the righteous, but sinners.”

Compassion. Love. Forgiveness.

THAT is what Jesus is. When Jesus was on the earth, people RAN to Him. Tax collectors and prostitutes sat at His feet just to be around Him. He ate dinner with them. He LOVED them. They wanted what HE had. He didn't pick and choose who to love or support. He didn't judge the prostitute and condone the drunk. 

These double standards are doing the one thing that I know we don't want - making Christians look like hypocrites. 

You can't judge someone for one thing and not judge someone else just because you think what that person did was "worse" - we all have things that we struggle with. Where is the love? Judging is exhausting, if you ask me. :)

I am NOT perfect by any means, and I have been and am a guilty party in this whole thing as well. It's human nature. But here's the thing that God has been really showing me lately:

It is not our job to change people. That's His job. If we stopped pointing fingers at what other people are doing wrong and kept our eyes on Jesus - letting Him transform us into His image and allowing Him to teach us how to love others with HIS love, then HE'LL take care of everyone else. It's not our job. 

If we keep our eyes on Jesus, HE'LL change us. He'll change them. Those double standards will vanish and this world will be a better place.

Until next time...

<3 Brooke

Outcast

Have you ever felt like a loser? Like no one cares if you are around or not? Have you ever thought you have no purpose in life? Do you find yourself being the "outcast"? The awkward one that hasn't found a group that they click with and the one who feels like they stick out? Well, I've got news for you.

You Matter.

That's right, I said it. YOU have a purpose and you are loved. God didn't make a mistake when He made you, and He knew before the beginning of time how YOU would change the world. You have a purpose. You have a calling. YOU are loved.

I spent a lot of my childhood and teen years dealing with insecurities and lacking confidence. From what I hear, people would've never guessed that! When I was younger, I used to keep a wall up and I looked serious a lot. To the point where some people said they were scared of me or that they thought I was constantly mad about something.

I worked on that and found a way to loosen up, relax, and just have fun. I remember talking to one of my guy friends about how I used to be shy, and he almost spit out his drink. He said he couldn't picture that because of how outgoing I was now, and how I'm always so happy.

That was a huge compliment to me. It was great to hear something like that, especially since I was standing there having that conversation, feeling like a was sticking out like a sore thumb.

I have never been the "glamour girl" or the girl that guys are automatically drawn to or find instantly "pretty". I've always been the "good friend" and the girl that everyone could come to for advice and talk to about their problems, but I've never been the "IT" girl.

That was hard for a long time. I wanted to be accepted, I wanted to feel like I mattered. I wanted to feel beautiful.

Over the years, I felt like I had no one. Sure, I have an AMAZING family and the most amazing, supportive parents a girl could ask for, who always told me they loved me and that I was beautiful. I've also had some amazing friends in my life. But inside, I was hurting. I had no one to turn to, except for THE one to turn to. Jesus.

I started running to Jesus with everything. And I do mean EVERYTHING. He became to me, what He longs to be for everyone - My best friend.  Over time, He started showing me how I mattered. He showed me my calling in life, and He showed me that Jeremiah 29:11 is true. He DOES know the plans He has for me, and they are SO amazing. I finally felt accepted and I believe I've learned (and am continuing to learn) what TRUE love and acceptance is. There's nothing like it. It's something that NO human can fulfill for you. I  became an "It" girl. :)

Guess what? He is no respecter of persons. He wants YOU to know true love. He wants you to realize that you matter. You have a purpose. You NEED to be here to fulfill the AMAZING plans He has for you. Trust me, they're amazing!

You are beautiful. Let me say that again. You. Yes, You. You are beautiful. You are fearfully and wonderfully made. Never forget that. Please. If all you get out of this is that you matter, then I've done my job.

Stay strong. I believe in you, but more importantly, Jesus believes in you. He is always there for you. ALWAYS. There is nothing that can separate you from His love. And I do mean NOTHING. You are worthy. He finds no flaw in you. He will always be by your side. Even when you make mistakes, or feel like no one is there for you, He is.

Believe in that.

Song of Solomon 4:7 (Amp)

"[He exclaimed] O my love, how beautiful you are! There is no flaw in you!"




Till next time...